{"id":713,"date":"2002-04-16T14:44:05","date_gmt":"2002-04-16T18:44:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/?p=713"},"modified":"2002-04-16T14:44:05","modified_gmt":"2002-04-16T18:44:05","slug":"713","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/?p=713","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"


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DANGER: WATCH OUT FOR PACKS OF RABID SQUIRRELS…<\/P><\/FONT>
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signs with those words on them should be on display all over this campus.  <\/P>
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As we all know, squirrels have been plotting the overthrow of mankind for several generations now.  They have been biding their time, and waiting for the perfect time to strike.<\/P>
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I have found in my short time here that Southeastern College, in Lakeland, FL, seems to be their main base of operations.  They are everywhere.  In the trees, in the bushes, in the grass, under cars, on cars… everywhere.  They jump out of nowhere, they stalk you… they are quite simply, out of control.<\/P>
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Just now… In my trek from my dorm to Emily and Lisa’s room over in Aventura, across campus, I was savagely attacked by such packs of squirrels.  One of them dashed out in front of me and then clung to a tree.  I saw several others all around me…  <\/P>
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Just as they were about to strike, several people walked near me.  The squirrels, being aware that multiple people could finish them off quickly, turned cowardly, and ran back up their trees.  I was saved only by the grace of God.<\/P>
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It has become ridiculous.  I can’t even leave my room anymore for fear that the squirrels may get to me.  Yes, sometimes I even fear that squirrels may have gotten inside… into the hallway.  My door is locked at all times.  I keep things shoved under the crack in the bottom of it… it is the perfect size for the squirrels to slip under…  coincidence?  I think not.  Obviously they have an inside man… some traitorous human working for squirrel world dominance designed this building…. I intend to find out who he is……….  and finish him….<\/P>
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more squirrel updates coming soon.<\/P>
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oh yes, and I still don’t understand people.<\/P><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

DANGER: WATCH OUT FOR PACKS OF RABID SQUIRRELS… signs with those words on them should be on display all over this campus.  As we all know, squirrels have been plotting the overthrow of mankind for several generations now.  They have been biding their time, and waiting for the perfect time to strike. I have found … Continue reading <\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/713"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=713"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/713\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=713"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=713"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/darkestlight.org\/xanga\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=713"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}